Coffee, cornbread and conversation: September 2005
Coffee, cornbread and conversation
random thoughts from a crazy girl
Sunday, September 25, 2005
Goodbye, Uncle Vernon...
I found out last Thursday afternoon that my uncle had died. He was sick for a long time, so I feel some relief to know that he is in a better place now. But, I also feel a bit of guilt for not seeing him during his sickness.
We weren’t particularly close, but I would have liked to have had the opportunity to see him before he passed. Unfortunately, messy family “issues” made that a little sticky, so I didn’t go see him.
As morbid as the subject of death is, it gives you the chance to think about life and how you want to live your life. Knowing that I didn’t see my uncle before he passed away will probably always bother me. But on the bright side, it makes me feel the need to share as much time as humanly possible with the people that I love.
We’ve had several ‘stop-the-violence’ type community events around the city over the past few weeks. I’ve even addressed the issue on my radio show as well. The alarming amount of bloodshed over the summer (and now) has prompted the need for these events. I am hoping and praying that something positive will come out of it.
Lately, it has been utterly painful watching the news and reading the newspaper. The amount of gun violence has gotten out of control. Day after day, I hear about someone being shot or killed. It makes me wonder why some people feel the need to settle their problems with guns.
Older people always reminisce about the past and say, “When I was a kid, there wasn’t so much violence.” And now, I realize that I have been saying the same thing more often than I should.
I remember fights occurring after school that usually ended with a day’s suspension, or an apology, but now, fights end up with a tragic outcome.
I wish I knew why some people feel the need to react so violently, and that the only way to defend themselves is with a weapon. Some people think that we need more programs for students, more job opportunities. I agree with those possible solutions, but I also believe that it goes a little deeper. We at first need to teach children the value of life. With that, they probably would not be so quick to take it away.
I know that I wrote about Kanye’s somewhat fly-off-the-handle behaviour a week ago, but I needed to comment on his latest antic.
On a televised program for the victims of Hurricane Katrina, Kanye was up to his outspoken self. Straying away from his script on the teleprompter, he looked into the camera and said, “George Bush doesn’t care about black people.” A shocked Mike Myers, who was standing beside him, just stared at him and didn’t say a word. Needless to say, the network heads were not impressed.
Kanye’s outburst was very explosive, but under the circumstances, I agree with him.
The hurricane disaster happened a week ago, and George Bush only set foot in the state three days after the tragedy. Images of disaster were depicted on every channel; it wasn’t like he didn’t know what was happening in his own country. It seemed like he chose to delay going to Louisiana to the very last possible moment. Maybe his reasoning was because 90% of the images that were on tv were of helpless black victims. Would his reaction been any different if the victims were non-black??? I’m just saying…
I hate to speak of race, but the blacks in New Orleans are portrayed in such an ugly light. They are seen as poor, destitute, looters that are living like savages, and other victims are portrayed differently.
I know that I condemned Kanye for being too hot headed, but in this case, I agree with him. People are dying, people are in danger, people are helpless and something needs to be done. He has called attention to the biased slant that the media and taken, also on the ridiculously late response of George Bush. I support you, Kanye!
Last week was crazy busy, but believe me, I will try to be a better blogger.
I thought that I would slow it down a little bit and talk about something that has been on my mind for some time now…….being single.
I used to love the freedom of being single- being able to flirt with anyone that I wanted, being able to go out with my friends without having to consider someone else. I know that it sounds a little selfish, I just meant that if a friend asked me to go out at a moment’s notice, as a single girl, I wouldn’t have to think twice about it—I would just go.
But back to the main topic of today's blog, lately I’ve been feeling a little lonely. I’ve been missing the special moments that you share with that special someone. Holding hands with your man, kissing your man, him kissing you, getting dirty e-mails from your man in the middle of the day, just to remind you how much he misses you. Damn, I miss being in a relationship.
Even though I haven’t been in a relationship for quite some time, I did crush on someone recently. I felt a little guilty about it because he wasn’t exactly single. I felt even worse when I realized that he liked me too. But, instead of giving into my animal instincts, I chose to get over my crush and leave the man alone!
So now I am back where I started—single and looking. I have to admit that I haven’t been actively looking. Being shy has definitely been a hindrance in finding that special guy. I'm afraid to approach a guy. I much rather that he come up to me and make his "move". Mind you, I've heard some of the dumbest lines ever! A very, very, very old man (he must be at leat 75 years old) told me that he liked the way that I looked and wanted to see what I looked like in a short skirt??!! kinda freaky, no??
A friend suggested that I try speed dating and another friend wants to set me up. I think for the time being I will try to put myself out there mentally and physically. Either that, or I will watch Love jones again for the millionth time.
I am a university graduate who started writing shortly after I finished school. I wrote poetry while I was in high school, but it wasn’t until I finished university that I took my writing seriously. I have published a zine, worked on a few newsletters, and now I currently write for happygrrls.
Besides all of that, I consider myself to be a bohemian girl who loves to write, talk and laugh. I love travelling, listening r&b and hip hop, and going out for a good meal.