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HITCH IN T.O. - PART 5: The date about nothing

30 Oct 2005

So here we are, the fifth and final installment of the Hitch in T.O. series. Perhaps inevitably, I didn't fool everyone and some people discovered my identity. But that's fine. There are still only a few folks in the secrets of the gods. For a while, I have kind of felt like Taye Diggs'' character, Harper, from the movie The Best Man -- with those in the know forever trying to decode who was Omarosa and who was Charlotte. Funny thing is, I'm pretty sure Charlotte knows who she is -- even though I didn't reveal it to her in so many words. Again, I don't mind. More on Charlotte later.

I may be wrong, but the last girl I'll talk about is still in the dark about the Undercover Brother series altogether. And that may be a good thing. After counting down the clock for the agonizing eight minutes from one of my dates which seemed to have less soul and presence than Martha Stewart on 106 & Park, I got the absolute pleasure of meeting ... hummmm ... let's call this one Elaine. Why Elaine? Well, I'm referring to Elaine Benes from one of the greatest T.V. shows of all time: Seinfeld (The Show About Nothing). For those who don't know, Jerry Seinfeld and Elaine had a thing in the past which didn't work out but they remained great friends. They get the same stupid jokes and they are bothered by the same things which would be wholly insignificant to any other sane people.

I got this immediate "Elaine" feeling with this one. Her glorious smile and beautiful spirit was a welcome contrast from my immediately preceding ordeal with ghetto Ice Queen. We bonded like we knew each other for years. Somehow, in a matter of minutes, we managed to talk about some obscure subjects that only the two of us in the room could ever end up talking about. Okay, we weren''t supposed to, based on the speed dating rules, but we had already established by the time the eight minutes were over that we would see each other again.

Let me guess, you're probably thinking to yourself, yeah, yeah ... yada yada yada ... so get to the point about "the thing" with Elaine. A gentleman doesn't go into details but, similarly to Jerry and Elaine, we did take a bite of the forbidden fruit but left the apple unfinished. Not that it wasn't a good apple but we found ourselves spending hours on the phone laughing about the same silly T.V. shows; that time when I had three-day old rotting pasta on my stove (that's such a Seinfeld episode -- an aberration considering my neat-freak personality I might add) and those silly date stories from the past.

So we soon realized who we were. We were Jerry and Elaine. And that was fine. In fact, it was great.

To sum it all up, I selected four dates out of the dozen I saw and ended up with three matches (hey ... you can''t win them all). But the ones I met were definitely the best. From the Nubian Connections event, I got my Elaine and my Charlotte. While I am not where I'd like to be with Charlotte yet, I like to think of it as a work in progress. But you can't expect any less from the Charlotte type.

Although Charlotte and I have gone on many dates since then, and likewise enjoy some great phone conversations, I have come to realize, admittedly with her help, that half the fun is in the courting. Who knows where it will lead. But somehow I have no desire to attend the next Nubian Connections event. And I guess that's the point, to be a one-time customer.

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